Why am I writing this blog? Blogs by nature are fairly narcissistic. I  assume that like most normal humans,  I possess some level of narcissism, but I don’t generally like drawing attention to myself. I’m here because I have been stagnant in my life for too long. So much so that it’s left me paralyzed and gripped with an overwhelming sense of fear of trying things.  It’s not like I lounge around on the couch in my spare time doing nothing and live with some sort of social phobia. I have just been at my current job for far too long.  I dread going into work, knowing there is little to nothing to I can do about my situation immediately. I suppose many people would be envious of having anything to do in this economy.  But I’m doing sales, selling an outdated product with narrower and narrowing margins and a swiftly declining market. Add to the fact that I work for a no name small business with no marketing budget, and you get the picture that I spend most of my days receiving rejection from people. Why those factors don’t change is a different conversation entirely. I have been doing the same thing for six years. At some point one begins to internalize and personalize the negativity.

So I am here to try to do something different. Writing a blog about my internal struggles isn’t going to save my sense of self. I’m not expecting that. However, I can’t forget a statement from my boss, who himself is a fascinating person with incredible talent. He told me once that as an entrepreneur, he tries lots of different directions and paths all the time, assuming one of them will ‘pop’ at some point. I’ve heard that sentiment echoed by more than one successful person lately. Any way it turns out, the process itself should be stretching.

I’m trying writing. I’m fairly good at constructing sentences and think I might be more introspective and insightful when I have to digest and regurgitate my thoughts. Don’t worry, this isn’t the only new ”avenue’ I’m trying. I’m not expecting this to be anything more than a simple blog, but sometimes people’s ideas or simple attempts take on a life of their own and grow into something bigger than they imagined. I have always wanted to write semi-professionally, but have no experience (is that true of many bloggers?).  This blog is my practice step.  Even if the only thing I’m practicing is working on something that isn’t big and grand and perfect in the first try, or even the first month.  Maybe this will be therapeutic for me, or maybe it will be for you as well.  So thanks for taking this journey with me.  I hope I can update for you regularly.